Frightened You'll Scare Your Clients? If You've Got It, Haunt It!

DO YOU FIND yourself holding back parts of who you are for fear that you’ll freak out your customers or clients?

Do you worry that they won’t like the real you if you let your professional mask slide?

What if the real you IS exactly what would drive business right to your door? Would that make you think twice?

When I first started my own coaching business 10+ years ago I quickly realised that there were trends that coaches followed on social media.

The first one I noticed was talking about ‘how transparent they were being’ by admitting sometimes they struggled with aspects of business, then there was a really odd phase where people did Facebook Lives from their beds talking about how they hadn’t “put their make up on or got dressed yet” but felt “so passionate” about a topic that they were compelled to share (hundreds of them, all at once!???).

One of my favourite phases was where it felt like “everybody” dyed their hair pink or purple and talked about the importance of being authentically themselves. I love pink or purple hair, but it’s a bit much to believe that ALL those people simultaneously discovered that their authentic-self wanted pink or purple hair.

In a world inundated by social media noise and frenetic activity, being yourself can feel like a tall order. It’s easy to be snaffled up by the masses and start comparing yourself to “influencers” who have millions of followers. It’s tempting to emulate how our business role models do things because we think that they have it sussed.

They don’t have it ALL sussed. They have discovered what works “for them”, and you will have a version of that too. The problem is that if you keep showing up trying to be something that you’re not, you’ll keep attracting people who like the version that’s not really you.

That’s a tough and unfulfilling act to maintain; it’d be like dressing up as a soap opera character every day for the rest of your life (whilst the real you is left to fade away).

What if you showed up as you? Do you really believe that of the 8-billion people in the world there aren’t going to be enough people to like or love the real you?

Perhaps you’re not even sure who the “real you” is because they’ve been hidden for so long. Here are 10 ways you can tap into the authentic you:

1)    What would you do if you thought nobody would judge you?

2)    What did you enjoy doing as a child (before it was judged right or wrong)?

3)    What are you doing when you are at your happiest?

4)    If you had an entire year (a week is too short!) in good health, how would you spend your time?

5)    What would your best friends who know you well say about you?

6)    What do you feel like saying but hold back?

7)    Speak your truth (you can still be kind!).

8)    Admit when you’re wrong and ask for help when you need it.

9)    Create some quiet time to reflect.

10) Although it might feel a bit uncomfortable at first, notice how much better you feel when you aren’t pretending to be something you’re not.

I’d love to hear how what gem you uncover. Email me sophia@sophiahanson.com

And if you’re ready to share MORE of the real you, book your Come Out From Behind The Mask session with me now. 

This article first appeared in Executive Magazine in October 2022 (page 58).